So now that the holiday season is in full swing at work and my social life has essentially come to a screeching halt until further notice, I’ve had a lot of time to get my ish together. My apartment has never been cleaner, finances kept up, and for once, my hair hasn’t been totally sucking. After a liiiiittle over two years of the single life, I think I finally have a pretty good grip on that whole inner happiness thing. You know, when the whole world reminds you that because you’re single, you should focus on being happy alone. Advice taken.
So now that I’m happy (and have been happy for quite some time), I decided to step back into that world. What a flipping nightmare modern dating is. Truly, some guys are absolutely, mindblowingly awful. That really blows for the few and far between good dudes of the world, because after about seven miserable dates, I was about ready to throw in the towel and go back to having fun. But then, I stumbled upon one of those elusive good guys.
And then I blacked out on our first date. Woke up hugging his toilet at 4 a.m. and was so embarrassed, I slipped out and took an Uber home. I laid in bed the whole next day wrapped in warm blankets of self loathing. Go figure, right? Complain incessantly about how crappy guys are, meet a good guy, make an awful first impression. All I could do at this point was apologize.
Then he asked me to hang out again that night. It was then that I wondered if this guy was actually insane. I mean honestly… there was (probably) nothing cute about a super belligerent Abby. Why would he want to see me again? But, he was adorable and super nice, so I decided not to ask questions and just enjoy his company again. Like the good guest I am, I stopped by the liquor store to pick up a bottle of stupid expensive champagne as a “Thanks for dealing with my drunk ass and thanks for wanting to hang out again” gift. I figure it was the least I could do
Fast forward to now. I’m sitting on my couch, half looking at MBA programs, half eating a grilled cheese, and half realizing that I might actually possibly maybe like this guy.
HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!?
Trust and believe, I don’t go on dates with any expectation other than good conversation and hopefully a good cocktail. Due to my extended hiatus from dating, or feelings in general, I have kind of forgotten how to handle this. I have absolutely no chill. I’m like a five year old. I think my coworkers are sick of it. Any time they ask how he is, I get this big goofy grin on my face. And then they mock me, like clockwork.
However, now that I am *~feeling~* again, I am accepting any and all pieces of advice to help keep my chill. I’m gonna try not to run this one off. Wish me luck!